“I can’t believe this thing,” I muttered, tapping the screen again. The camera app had frozen for the third time tonight. “It’s like it’s cursed. ”
“Did you try turning it off and on again?
” Flo asked, not looking up from the grill he was setting up. “Yeah, I did. Still glitching. ”
“Try a different USB cable,” I said, swapping the charging cord.
“Some of these cables can’t handle the power. I actually bought a meter just to test mine. ”
“You measure your cables? ”
“You’d be surprised how many are garbage,” I said.
“I had one that made my cameras flicker because it couldn’t deliver the wattage. ”
“Classic,” Flo said. “Reminds me of that old prank call where the guy calls Sony about his VCR and they tell him to press the button that says ON/OFF. ”
“Oh, that one’s gold,” I laughed.
“And the one where the guy tries to order a flag with the Pakistani flag for his friends in Cologne, and the roofer just loses it. ”
“He called twice, you know,” Flo said. “Years apart. The roofer remembered him.
”
“That’s dedication. ”
We were out by the water, the evening settling in. The plan was simple: a few hours of fishing, some grilled food, and a live stream for the chat. Flo was my colleague, and we’d done this before.
But tonight, everything felt off. “So what’s the plan with the camera? ” Flo asked. “I’m taking it with me when we go out on the boat,” I said.
“I’ll just clip it onto the mount. ”
“You’re bringing the camera but not the chat? ”
“I don’t have a harness,” I said. “It’ll have to go in my pocket.
”
“You’re going to put the camera in your pants? ”
“Just for a bit. ”
The chat was getting restless. A new viewer had joined and was asking when something would happen.
“He’s impatient,” I said. “Everyone’s saying we should get going. ”
“Tell them we’re almost ready,” Flo said. “I just need to finish the grill.
”
I looked over at the tent we’d set up. “We should clear the path a bit. I don’t want anyone tripping on the cables in the dark. ”
“Good idea.
I already taped down the cables over here. ”
“The wind’s supposed to pick up,” I said. “I’m a bit worried about the camera rig. ”
“It’s sturdy,” Flo said.
“I’ve anchored it down. ”
“Yeah, but I’m still nervous about someone getting hurt when the fishing line goes out,” I said. “Especially with that big sturgeon swimming around. ”
“I saw it earlier,” Flo said.
“Right by the edge. Huge thing. ”
“They love these channels,” I said. “The big ones stay further out, but this one came right up to us.
”
We talked about the gear for a while. Flo mentioned he’d bought a new encoder, but he wasn’t happy with it. “The battery dies and I have to swap it out, which means going offline. That’s exactly what I didn’t want.
”
“So you’re stuck with the pause screen again? ” I asked. “Yeah, that one where I’m dancing by the stream. It’s been the placeholder for ages.
I never changed it. ”
“You should fix that. ”
“I have no energy for that,” he said. “It’s all fiddly settings and menus.
”
“It’s time-consuming if you do it right,” I said. “I watch this guy who does tech streams, and the amount of work he puts into it is insane. ”
“Yeah, but he makes it look easy. ”
“Nothing about this is easy,” I said.
Flo laughed. “If we win the lottery, we’re going to Canada. Get a truck with a winch and go sturgeon fishing. ”
“With a floating excavator,” I added.
“Exactly. A floating excavator. ”
“You know what they call a magic wand in French? ” I asked.
“No. ”
“Baguette magique. ”
“No way. ”
“Seriously.
Look it up. ”
“That’s insane,” Flo said. “I’m going to ask my French colleague about that. ”
“Do it.
”
We were laughing, but the chat was still waiting. A new viewer asked if something was happening soon. “Yes, we’re about to start,” I said. “Just give us a minute.
”
“I need to build the grill first,” Flo said. “Otherwise we’re not eating tonight. ”
“I’ll help,” I said. “Just tell me what to do.
”
“Grab the table and bring it over here. ”
I went to get it, then stopped. “Actually, I should move it away from the tent. The smoke will be too close.
”
“Good call,” Flo said. “We don’t want the tent smelling like grease. ”
“Also, I found this headlamp,” I said, holding it up. “Twenty bucks for four of them.
They’re great. ”
“From Temu? ”
“Yeah. Sometimes that site is actually decent.
”
“I bought some stuff there too,” Flo said. “Surprisingly good quality. ”
“I was at the wholesaler today,” I said. “Some plumber came in looking for a spare part for a huge old valve from 1900.
I just typed in ‘old valve’ and found it on Amazon. Can you believe that? ”
“Amazon has everything now. ”
“It’s insane.
”
The light was starting to fade. “Can you still see us? ” I asked the chat. “Or should I turn on the lights?
”
“It’s getting dark,” Flo said. “Let’s turn them on. ”
I switched on the LED lamp and pointed it at the water. “Wow, that’s bright.
”
“That thing is strong,” Flo said. “I can’t even look at it directly. ”
“I bought it for twenty-four euros,” I said. “Had it for two years now.
Works better than my big fan, honestly. My attic gets so hot, and this thing just blasts air. ”
“That’s a steal. ”
“Yeah, it’s crazy what you can get for cheap these days.
”
Flo was adjusting the grill. “You know, I lost five kilos,” he said. “Had to tighten my belt all the way. ”
“Good for you.
”
“I was in Hamburg recently. Hotel breakfast was great. ”
“Nice. ”
The chat was buzzing.
Someone subscribed. “Thanks for the sub,” I said. “Sorry, I didn’t hear the notification. ”
“The sound is messed up,” Flo said.
“It’s fine. We’ll manage. ”
I looked out at the water. The sturgeon had disappeared, but I knew it was still out there.
“I think I saw it again, right by the edge,” I said. “It’s swimming along the bank. ”
“They do that,” Flo said. “The big ones stay deeper, but this one’s curious.
”
“It’s only a few meters away. The lamp is really pulling them in. ”
“That lamp is insane,” Flo said. “Look at how far the light reaches.
”
“I know. It’s perfect for this. ”
We stood there for a moment, watching the water. The grill was heating up, the light was bright, and the chat was waiting.
“Alright,” I said. “Let’s get this show on the road. ”
“You ready? ” Flo asked.
“Almost,” I said. “I just need to figure out where to put the camera. ”
“Just clip it onto the mount,” Flo said. “It’ll be fine.
”
“Yeah, but I’m still worried about the cables,” I said. “If someone trips, it’s over. ”
“I told you, I taped them down. ”
“I know, I know.
”
I looked at the camera, then at the boat. “I’ll take it with me when we go out. ”
“You’re really putting it in your pants? ”
“Just for a bit,” I said.
“It’ll be fine. ”
The chat was cheering. They could feel the anticipation. “Alright,” I said.
“Let’s do this. ”
I grabbed the camera, checked the battery—12 percent—and headed toward the boat. The light was bright, the water was calm, and the sturgeon was somewhere out there.
“Here we go,” I said.
